How Expressing Gratitude Can Improve Your Relationships
Have you ever started a new job ready to be the best employee they have seen, only to be met with criticism? This doesn’t motivate you to continue doing your best work, does it? I bet it definitely doesn’t make you happy to be at the workplace anymore, either. Personally, on numerous occasions I have found myself dreading the workday and just going through the motions until the clock said it was time to go home. This was caused by repeated criticism and lack of feedback from my employer. Eventually, I knew what to expect.
Now take that negative experience and compare it to a time when your employer praised or expressed gratitude toward you in the workplace. Didn’t you feel more motivated? Did you crave more of that recognition and praise? Would you want to make your employer proud?
This feeling doesn’t only have to apply to workplace scenarios. When you receive praise from a parent, coach, teacher, or significant other, you will likely find yourself craving more. As a result, you will begin putting your best self forward because you know it will be appreciated. Further, you find yourself happy and looking forward to being in their presence because you have no reason to fear criticism. When you receive criticism, you lose the motivation to be your best self. You may also begin to avoid your critic, as nobody wants to hear about all of their negative traits. Words truly matter in this world. Whether you use words that praise and express gratitude or criticize and express negative feelings, you will find that your world will be shaped and defined by those words.
What the Research Says
This article from Harvard University explores a study that focused on couples. The study found that when one’s significant other took the time to express gratitude toward them, the person being praised held a more positive feeling toward their significant other. They also found that the person receiving praise felt more comfortable being open with their partner about concerns they were having in the relationship.
That same article found studies showing that managers who say thank you or give their employees pep talks in which they express gratitude toward them had employees who felt more motivated to work harder. These employees wanted to give their employer more reason to feel grateful toward them. They began to express this in their work ethics. The control group of this study, in which the employer told the employees nothing, produced 50% less work than the group that received a pep talk in which the employer expressed gratitude toward them. So, as you can see, it’s not just you who feels better about people who give you praise.
3 Ways You Can Express Gratitude to Improve Your Relationships
- Tell Your Partner the Little Things You Appreciate About Them. Whether your partner brews a delicious cup of coffee for you every morning, is the best listener, or knows how to give you the perfect cuddle to cheer you up when you’re feeling down, let them know! Don’t let these little acts of love go unappreciated. Let your partner know that you see their expressions of love throughout the day that show how much they love you!
- Tell Your Employees Thank You. Whether an employee got a lot of sales, produced high quality work, or has shown little improvements since they began, make them feel seen! Tell your employees how much you appreciate them for helping you hit the goals you have for your company!
- Thank Your Family and Friends for Supporting You. We all do so much better when we have a strong support system surrounding us. It is so easy to take advantage of that support system and lean on those who love you. Whoever is a part of that support system for you, let them know how much they have helped you and how grateful you are for their support.
Reference
Harvard Health Publishing. (2019, June 5). In Praise of Gratitude. Harvard Health. https://www.health.harvard.edu/newsletter_article/in-praise-of-gratitude
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